Heat waves have some cities across the country experiencing record-breaking high temperatures, but it turns out, some romances are cooling off despite the weather. In a new dating trend, “summer shading,” couples are putting their relationships on ice for the season instead of heating things up.
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Julie Nguyen, a dating expert at Hily dating app, explains that it’s not a total breakup, rather it’s one partner pumping the breaks for a little fun and freedom in the summer sun. It gives them a chance to explore new opportunities they wouldn’t have in a completely committed relationship. Since no one wants to be the one being summer shaded, Nguyen warns these are the red flags to watch out for.
- Plans get canceled or never made – Waiting around for someone you love or even just like to make plans can be frustrating, and it’s one of the signs of summer shading. “Suddenly, every hangout suggestion is met with ‘I’m slammed,’ ‘My friends are in town,’ or (the classic) ‘I’m traveling soon,’” Nguyen explains. “It starts to feel like you’re just an afterthought—always benched in favor of sparklier summer plans.”
- They’re out and about … but not with you – If the person you’re interested in always seems to be too busy for you, and only you, that’s a pretty clear sign they’re summer shading you. When you hear about all the fun adventures they’re having, and they seem to have time for everything and everyone but you, it could be summer shading.
- Everything feels vague – Instead of breaking things off with you, they always seem to leave you hanging with comments like “Let’s see when I get back!” or “We’ll figure out something soon.” All plans and talks seem to now be open-ended and non-committal, so you’re insecure about what’s really going on.
- You’re ghosted … but not quite – With summer shading, they’re not totally ignoring you, just stringing you along. “Replies are delayed, get shorter, or disappear altogether—except for the occasional ‘let’s catch up in a few weeks!’ message,” Nguyen shares. “It’s just enough to keep you hoping, but not enough to feel connected. Welcome to emotional limbo.” And you deserve better than that!
Source: Vice
